Otou-San asked for a story, so, I wrote him one:
Guy1 is walking in the park.
Guy1 is incredibly handsome.
Guy2 sees Guy1.
Guy2 is very muscular and well defined.
Guy2 runs over to Guy1.
Guy2: Good evening, sir. I could not help but notice that you possess a rather fine posterior. May I lower your well selected, fashionable pants and proceed to have anal intercourse with you?
Guy1: Why certainly. Please allow me to bend over.
Guy1 bends over. Guy2 pulls down his own pants. Guy2 pulls down Guy1’s pants. Guy2 engages in intercourse.
Guy1 moans. Guy2 grunts.
1 hour later…
Guy2 pulls out and pulls up his pants. Guy2 pulls up Guy1’s pants.
Guy1: That was a pleasant experience.
Guy2: Quite.
Guy1: Well, cheerio, I need to get home and polish my monocle.
Guy2: Farewell then.
Then the two guys walked their own paths.
The End.
(Source: twitter.com)
Source: http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m12fod80f41roi5yvo1_r1_1280.jpg
Via Predederva
So there!
(via yuriyurarararayuruyuridaijiken)
Someone linked this on my Twitter feed. This is great.
My buddy John Sato gave me this blog game award thing. Now, should I wish to comply, I need to answer a few questions. For one reason or another, I was a bit hesitant in posting this on my main blog, but as a Lord, I feel the need to answer the questions of loyal subjects like John.
So, let us see how I answer this while revealing as little about myself as possible. Here we go.
The craziest thing I have done is:I am a pretty hairy guy. Back in high school, my friends would jokingly mock my hairiness. I do not know if it was this joke mockery or some other madness that eventually prompted the thought “Hmm, let us try shaving our legs” while sitting on my throne in the washroom.
Unfortunately, I ended up shaving a little bit too close to my skin and some of it peeled of. Yeah, I looked at my razer and actually saw a decent sized (a circumference of close to a centimeter) chunk of skin.
My attempt to ease the bleeding with cold water was fruitless and I had to evacuate the washroom and seek medical assistance from my mother. Fortunately, the cut wasn’t deep, so, it healed pretty quickly. Unfortunately, I walked around with half shaven legs.
People are surprised thatI was born on the moon. Oh and I haven’t seen the Godfather yet either.
My favorite thing islikely my camera even though I never really use it.
Apparently,people think I am a nice guy. I only pretend to be a nice guy in order to get people to drop their guards around me. Once they are defenseless, I stab them with my titanium dagger, figuratively speaking of course.
I am sorry I don’t publish posts on a more frequent basis.
With that said and out of the way, I am going to pass this award along to the following, should they actually wish to take part.
The O-NEW squad (they can do a joint post or just make it individually. It doesn’t matter.)
Inushinde (cause he normally likes this kind of thing.)
Marrow (when and if he comes back.)
“I like you”
“I don’t”
“Like you?”
“No”
“Like me?”
“Yes”
“You don’t like me?”
“Yes”
“Why?”
“You tempt me”
“How?”
“By existing”
“Not my fault is it?”
“No.”
“But, you still hate me?”
“Yes”
“How can I possibly hurt you?”
“You can’t.”
“Then why..”
“I hurt myself when I am near you.”
“Don’t…”
“I can’t hel…”
“I am different than the others”
“Them all say that…”
“Everyone lies, except me…”
“No, you lie to”
“This is the first time we have met, how do you know that?”
“Because you are no different…”
“Are you stereotyping?”
“No, speaking from experience”
“What, experience, how many others have your lips met?”
“Far too many”
“But not enough, just one…”
“No, one is too..”
“Just one, a light peck, a light kiss….”
“No….”
“I taste sweet, I promise…”
“No…”
“Declicously sweet…, just one more drink between night and blue…just one more”
“No..”
“Just…”
“NO!”
He grabbed the bottle and threw it against the wall, surprising the bar tender and sobering up the other patrons. Then he walked outside. The drink had lied, it was already noon.
Explore in silent rhythm the curse He paced nervously. Tap, tap, tap, his feet crashed on the ceramic floor in a steady rhythm. They were getting close, real close. That tingling sense of excitement that all explorers get when their journey is close to an end had filled up his insides many hours ago.
He forced himself to calm down and reduced the speed of his pacing, but it was only a matter of time before his feet picked up and the rhythm of his walk increased once more. “Where the hell are they, haven’t the sensors sensed anything yet”, he thought. “Could I be wrong, could be still be far..” the sound of the electronic titanium door opening interrupted that thought, and Explorer John Pinwheel hid a smile for he knew his gut had been right.
“Captain, we have received a strange signal on the receiver. It is a waveform with an oscillating frequency of exactly 2.71828… mega Hertz. The strangest thing though is that the frequency is incredibly accurate. Even with our expensive analysing equipment, we cannot discern any variations whatsoever.” Reported First Mate Markus.
“A forever steady rhythm with a value of the natural constant itself. As I thought, we are reaching the so called cursed zone.” John said. “Open the shutters, let us look outside!” he yelled, his voice far deeper and coarser than his young face would suggest possible. “Aye, aye captain!”
The blinds slowly lifted. The sounds echoing throughout the hall spoke of gears and shafts in perfect synchronicity with one another. At last, the blinds were up, and the two men stared out into the vast reaches of space. ‘The cursed Zone’, a region of space named as such because it was said that no ship entering could ever escape its hold.
Quite suddenly, John knew why people did not escape this zone. He had known it all along, but his explorer ideals had hidden it from him. The rhythm of his zone, it messed with you, it made you explore in silent rhythm the curse behind the rhythm, but unlike other rhythms, this one had no end. It would go on forever, until the end of time.
But, humans can only live so long, and Pinwheel had other places to go, other treasures to dig. “Turn us around Markus”. “I am sorry, what…”. “Just turn dammit, there is no point in exploring a place that forever stays the same and drums upon its inhabitants the only tempo it knows”. “Aye, aye captain.”
